Now, look inside and witness the dialogue between your Inner Guide and yourself, the conversation between that part of yourself that is an all-knowing, nurturing and empowering authority that only wants the best for you and the part of yourself that is a developing authority. Another approach you may use, is what I call “a double extreme” technique.

Inside you there is a master communicator, presenter; someone so gifted with unique abilities and sensibilities. How to bring that one out, and release everything unlike itself?

Let’s say, for example, that you have a pattern of talking too fast, and you wish to be able to be more present in your communication. Instead of trying to talk to yourself (if “the Inner Guide” approach doesn’t work), exaggerate (what I call “the double extreme” technique) the area that you see as too serious, that is, talks too fast.

Then talk slower than you ever talked in your life up to now. And then once again even faster, and then slower. Repeat this exercise sequentially 3 times: fast and slow, faster and slower, fastest and slowest. Then find the place in between – not a homogenised mixture, yet the best of both, the part of you that is both able to go quicker, speedier, that has the enthusiasm and joy in it, and the part of you that is slower, that allows you to feel more, to feel more comfortable and connected in your body.

Where to find that electric, dynamic, kinetic balance that equals poise? What sensations and locations are activated when you are in command of your stand? And how to recognise them, so you can get back there at a moment’s notice, when you need it the most? Practicing this “double extreme” technique in front of the mirror, even just hearing yourself standing in the room alone, as well as practicing with a friend who knows how to do this exercise, is a good opportunity.

This shifting, once you begin to do it and incorporate it in all the ways you speak, becomes easier and easier over time. It will awaken your natural authenticity as you go beyond the constraints of your earlier comfort zone, allowing a new comfort zone with fuller range of self expression to emerge – and surge!